There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so

I've been in New York two weeks now, frantically afraid of running into someone I know, hiding behind my sunglasses and excessive make-up. Conscience doth make cowards of us all. I finally managed to call Avy an hour or so ago, she didn't recognize my voice when I said hello so I guess it's been too long.

Italy was good to me, as it always is but I need things to change now, in whatever way. Tomorrow never felt more real or frightening but maybe it's a good thing.

Today I'm washing away the make-up and I'm ready to stare into the sun on Fifth Avenue. Avy is coming to meet me and sometimes I forget what she looks like and how it feels to hold her close.