Liberating or afraid

I dreamed about her. I don't know if I should be scared or excited, so I try not to to think too much about it. All my life I've been doing just that, thinking too much, and it never leads to anything good. The happiest people seem to be those who just carry on and don't mind everything that is potentially hurtful. I'll try to be more like them.

And the Avy situation, maybe that's the solution? To just let her go for a while, until I can talk to her without thinking about Henry and how she treated me this summer. I told her, she seemed sad but it's the only fair thing I can do right now. I just can't handle any more drama just now, I need to take care of myself first.

And tonight I'm going to draw naked girls again. Maybe she'll be there, the one I dreamed of.


  1. Don't be scared. The body is incredible. We are meant to be curious things.

  2. Relax and do what you love to do :-)

  3. People who don't think too much and avoid everything that seems potentially hurtful, will get a hurtful explosion in their face someday, and won't know how to handle it. It's better to confront these things sooner than later. So hang in there, and try to enjoy your profound thoughts even when they're scary: if you have to decide, be excited, not scared.

  4. They're beautiful pictures, Stephanie. The ones of you in blue and wearing a tiara.

    And there's another beautiful picture of you in your posting. It's the one you painted with words. This Stephanie is intelligent and self-contained and self-reliant.

    It was a good night at the naked-girl-drawing class, wasn't it?

  5. I'm positive that you and Avy are going to find your friendship again, even if it isn't right now.

    Will you show us any of your drawings soon?

  6. Just be yourself and don't think of being somebody else coz you will never be comfortable being or acting what you are not. Let things move, whatever is meant to stay shall stay. Would love to see your drawings.