I'm in London, about to go to bed. I checked in to the Hilton, Avy told me I could probably visit her friend that lives here but I'm too shy. Now I feel stupid because I'm all alone and not sure what to do.
It was hard leaving Italy and my aunt, but I got tired of the countryside and the quiet war between her and my father. Like I said, I understand him better now but I'm also more afraid. Of my whole family, its history, the future. It's so weird that the Italians never speak of the mafia, when everyone knows it's there all the time. It's like a cancer, and I guess people hope that ignoring it will make it go away. Well, I know I will never be able to forget it ever again. Good or bad.